It will not surprise you that I was sceptical when the Government told us they would be interfering with the energy tariffs. Apparently the energy companies have been fleecing us all by having hundreds of different tariffs with all sorts of complicated charges. So from November the energy companies have to offer simple tariffs to make it easy for the stupid to work out which tariff best suits them.

I'm livid. We took the decision to go green three years ago and rip out the gas boiler replacing it with a heat pump. We kept the gas to heat the pans. Last year my gas bill was £7 while my electricity bill £800.

My supplier SSE has just written to me to tell me that under Cameron's wonder scheme they have to charge me a standing charge of 25p a day for the pleasure of having gas and a further 23p a day for electricity. As a result my 2014 gas bill will be 98.25, an increase of 1300% over the 2013 figure. Thanks David, that will teach me to go green.

In a fit of rage I gave SSE both barrels over the phone and have had the gas meter ripped out. We now have no hob and my wife is fuming ... bizarrely she blames me.

Mr Cameron you have ruined my life. I'm sure at Eton they taught you some manners so I would have thought an apology to my wife is the least I could expect.
I'm not holding my breath.

But any suggestions on how to get the hob going cheaply would be greatly received.